... I am a terrible patient.

As are most women, I believe. Especially mothers.
Today I am home sick. Nothing too terrible, I think I just ran myself a bit ragged. I finally hit a wall last night and my body said "no more, thank you.".  I was in bed pretty early and slept pretty late. I had a nasty migraine this morning when my alarm went. Some Tylenol, some more sleep, and presto chango, (mostly) healed Mommy! Thanks to my wonderfully supportive husband, I didn't have to worry about taking care of Nick last night or this morning. All I had to do was rest. Well, now I have. I feel, for the most part, much better.
However, I am real stickler when Jason is sick for reminding him not to do too much too soon. Getting sick is our bodies way of telling us to slow down, take it easy, yadda yadda. I am not so good at taking my own advice.
Now that I am feeling a bit better, I keep looking around the house and seeing all these things I could be doing since I'm home and kid-free for the day. I'm also trying to work out a plan to get my run in before bed since I missed it this morning. None of these behaviors fall into the "taking it easy" category. I'm very much aware that I probably need to listen to my body and rest today while I can. But I'm also aware of how much easier it is to clean the bathrooms without a toddler underfoot who wants to go potty every time he lays his gorgeous blue eyes on the toilet.
As women, and especially as mommies, we are engrained with the need and responsibility to care for our families. It is our job, our privilege (though it doesn't always feel that way) to be the caretaker. To kiss the boo-boos, and make sure the blankie is clean for bedtime. When the roles are reversed, we have a hard time being on the receiving end. I will admit, I can be a whiner when I don't feel good. But when it comes down to it, if I am truly honest, I do not like having to be cared for. I don't like feeling like I can't care for my family. Jason is truly wonderful about being a team player and being a hands-on dad. He never minds filling my shoes when it's needed. And there is a part of me that knows it's good for Nick to see that, to see that Daddies can do what Mommies can do when it comes to such basic things like handling dinner and bath-time, bed-time stories and night time tuck-ins. But when I can't do it, I miss it.
And so I want to get back into my role as soon as possible. I want to jump back in and get the house clean and get dinner cooked and be able to play trucks and color and read Interrupting Chicken. I want to do all those things, even if it means I feel a bit under the weather for a little longer than necessary. I confess I am a terrible patient. I confess I too frequently put my own needs beneath what I think my family expects of me. I confess I have a difficult time caring for myself when sometimes that is what is most needed. But I also confess I am a mommy. And that is what mommies do.