... I am a runner. Most days.

Descartes said "I think, therefore I am." I wonder, how far can that statement go? I cook, therefore I'm a cook. Well, I may not make my living as a cook or as a chef, but where my family is concerned I am a cook. I've painted several pieces, does that make me a "painter"? I enjoy singing, does that make me a "singer"? I drink alcohol, does that make me a "drinker"? I write a blog, does that make me a "writer"? I run, so does that make me a "runner"?
So often, to say one is a ______, implies that the activity is done on a professional or expert level. And how often have we shied away from labeling ourselves as a painter, or singer, chef, or runner for fear of not measuring up? For fear of being outed as an amateur masquerading as an expert.
John Bingham, author and marathon runner, said it best. “If you run, you are a runner. It doesn't matter how fast or how far. It doesn't matter if today is your first day or if you've been running for twenty years. There is no test to pass, no license to earn, no membership card to get. You just run.” The quote is from his book "The Courage to Start". That book is the reason I run at all. About 3 years ago, I was on Amazon looking for a book. In the Suggested Titles section, "The Courage to Start" was listed. The title caught my attention and as I read the description, it occurred to me that I was afraid. I was afraid that I was stuck, never moving forward, doomed to repeat the constant cycle of weight loss and gain for the rest of my life. I was intrigued by this man's concept that you didn't need to look like a runner, or be able to run a marathon to be a runner. You simply needed to run. I decided that $8.99 + shipping was a worthwhile investment (Sorry it's a bit more now. This was 3 years ago after all). When the book arrived, I devoured it. I couldn't put it down. Though as good as the book was, I realized I eventually had to stop reading and start running. And run I did.
For the last few years, I have pushed myself and done things I would have never thought possible as a "fat girl". Because of running, I see myself differently. I see myself as stronger and more capable than ever before. I am more confident because I know I can do whatever I decide. This is not at all to say that it has been easy. I am not one of the fortunate few who is simply hard-wired to challenge and push myself day in and day out. No matter how much I love to run, my body and my mind constantly fight against me. Many times I have to force myself out the door and out onto the road. Most days I crave that time on the road, but the harsh reality is that my brain always leans towards the path of least resistance. If I can find a viable reason not to do it, I most likely will. That doesn't mean I don't love it. It just means I have to work harder to do it.
I have learned over the years when I can run and when I can't, when I should run and when I shouldn't. But most importantly, I have learned that I don't have to run everyday to be a runner. I don't have to run great distances or long hours to be a runner. I just have to run. And so I confess I am a runner. Most days.